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the greatest skill i learned from my momma is how to track shit down. gimme a first name and a vague idea of looks and ill find that bitch. i saw a picture of a pair of shoes on instagram and (it took me a while) but i found those fucking shoes and now my old roommates are jealous of my bitchin shoes. so tell me how the only person i cant seem to find is my fucking father?

fucked up shit.

i went to a movie night at my job tonight and before i left, my roommate pinned a flower in my hair and she’s just a sweetheart and i smelled good all night #win

catspijamas:

shaydee604:

This is what happens when white guys listen to Indian music

this is the most fabulous thing ever.

i want to be best friends with them

becomming:

xlizardx:

Apparently this is "The clearest photo of Mercury ever taken."

why isnt everyone getting so excited about this, it is literally another planet look at how beautiful it is stop what your doing and look at how alien like this planet is what is living there oh my god mercury

becomming:

xlizardx:

Apparently this is "The clearest photo of Mercury ever taken."

why isnt everyone getting so excited about this, it is literally another planet look at how beautiful it is stop what your doing and look at how alien like this planet is what is living there oh my god mercury

narwhal-noir:

I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

thedrugskeepme-high:

binedect-camburbetch:


thepotterwholockian:

umqraa:

ronweasley:

jamesandhisginger:

theghostfromhoneydukes:

robinwantstobeamoderndancer:

#look at neville’s face. #he’s trying so hard #to be all like, #”wow great singing! #nice job!” #because he’s a fucking #sweetheart like that #just such a goddamn nice guy.

it’s even better than that because he’s trying to protect trevor’s ears instead of his own XD I love you neville<3 

#and ron is so badass he doesn’t even need to cover his ears #he’s all like ya’ll mad? 

Ron is used to it because Percy loves to sing in the shower.

but omfg the knight in the background is all like wHO DARE COMES TO ATTACK ME

yeah but dean and seamus are holding hands

Wait whaT
wait what


WHAT

thedrugskeepme-high:

binedect-camburbetch:

thepotterwholockian:

umqraa:

ronweasley:

jamesandhisginger:

theghostfromhoneydukes:

robinwantstobeamoderndancer:

#look at neville’s face. #he’s trying so hard #to be all like, #”wow great singing! #nice job!” #because he’s a fucking #sweetheart like that #just such a goddamn nice guy.

it’s even better than that because he’s trying to protect trevor’s ears instead of his own XD I love you neville<3 

#and ron is so badass he doesn’t even need to cover his ears #he’s all like ya’ll mad? 

Ron is used to it because Percy loves to sing in the shower.

but omfg the knight in the background is all like wHO DARE COMES TO ATTACK ME

yeah but dean and seamus are holding hands

Wait whaT

wait what

WHAT

chaoshasaface:

padawanmedic:

apathbetweenthestars:

Source

I am dyingggg omg 😂😂😂😂

I can relate to this. And I totally believe all of these 😹😹

apronsheelsandcollars:

sassmaster-arjay:

undeadcosmicunicorn:

Impulse - $6.99

Buy me all of them

done

petition to remove those nasty fucking buttered popcorn jelly beans from the bag….and take the coffee ones too…..yuck

and to add more pear beans

this would help tremendously when i get like that….someone keep this in mind for my next period of the “i-dont-knows” mmkay?

demon-moose:

spookytox:

jacks-compass:

thecrowdedmindofjohnnydepp:

 ”no u arent doing it right let me demonstrate”

Johnny depp teaching other johnny depps so they can rule the world in his absence

The mother Depp teaches it’s Depplings how to behave in the wild. 

depplings